In 2016, I was wondering around Gap looking for a baby shower present for a dear friend. I stumbled upon this onesie and immediately purchased it for myself as a means to tell my husband we were pregnant- I wanted to be prepared for that special moment as we were certain it would be happening soon! When buying this onesie, I had hopes of this perfect fairytale story that I would have with my highschool sweetheart turned husband. We had been together since age 17 and couldn’t wait to continue to grow our family!
Sadly, this onesie continued to collect dust in the closet for 5 years with repeated failed fertility treatments and negative pregnancy tests. I almost gave this onesie away on multiple occasions but something always made me keep it. Probably Hope. The Hope of a dream.
5 years of infertility caused reality to set in. Eventually we shifted our Hope from “becoming pregnant” to “growing our family.”
In 2019, we obtained our foster license.
In 2020, we became foster parents and later that year adoptive parents to the most precious 3 year old girl!
8 weeks after becoming foster parents, a miracle happened: we became expecting parents without the help of any medications or fertility treatments! In February 2021, another perfect baby girl entered our world! Within 11 months, we added two beautiful girls.
These photos are a dream that came true. A surreal moment of Hope. This onesie caused a lot of hard tears but now I smile big.
Motherhood for me: a medical needs mama, a foster mama, an adoptive mama, a mama of an angel baby from an ectopic pregnancy, a mama that struggled with years of infertility.
For some, my road seems messy. Looking back, the timing was always right. My infertility struggles led me to an adoption- an unbelievable gift and truly beautiful piece of our family story.
Did you know that an elephant is pregnant for 2 years and a typical baby elephant weighs approximately 265 pounds? Their wait is long because the end result is mighty.
– When your Hope feels small, Carry on.
– Don’t fear a shift in Hope.
– Trust the wait.
– Embrace the Uncertainty.
My family is very different from what I envisioned. The other day I asked my husband, “When we were 17 did you think our story would ever include long distance through college, an ectopic pregnancy, our first child being diagnosed with a terminal brain disease, years of infertility, being foster parents, and being adoptive parents?” A child with a terminal illness, an adoption, and years of infertility were not on our vision board; however, the outcome of our family is SO MUCH BETTER than the original dreams! We are a family truly built on love even through the hardest and wavering times. The hard times allow you to cherish the good times even more.
I share this raw part of my life to bring Hope to other couples struggling with infertility.
During infertility awareness week, please pray for all the waiting mothers and couples. And please share this story of Hope.
“Even when your Hope feels like it’s fading- just remember that even elephants start out small.”
